March 2001 Where there is suffering, there are also blessings:)

March 2001...What a month this has been. It has been hard physically, emotionally, and even spiritually. I have been getting inspiration from St. Therese of Lisieux, though! I try to remember that there were often times when she, too, felt, confused and spiritually "arid" as she would say. I don't feel arid, really, but this month has been very hard.
The doctors think I may have something other than Myastenia which is causing the vision and breathing troubles. They believe that it is autoimmune in nature but they are not quite sure. My labs continue to come back abnormal and I am getting progressively worse physically so it is very frustrating as they can not attempt to treat the disease until they find out what it is.
However, blessings do continue. This month our Parish was fortunate enough to be graced with a visit with a priest who has one of Bl. Padre Pio's gloves. As you know, Bl. Padre Pio is one of my intercessors so this was just a thrill. Thank you, Mirla and Perla for your help at the Church. We also had a speaker, Susan Tassone, speak about the Holy Souls in Purgatory. Hopefully, I will be able to share with you in the coming months some of the things she spoke about.
Again, your letters and guest book entries continue to encourage and inspire me. Thank you so much :) Thanks, too, for the prayers. I know that they have helped me gain strength both physically and spiritually.

March 2001 Hey...Why are YOU smiling at me??

Today is the first day of Lent and I am trying to decide what I can do for Lent to show Jesus how much I appreciate his dying on the cross for me. I am still pondering. I do know that I want to try to be kinder to those I meet...even if it just means to make eye contact more and smile at those I meet...I really want to try. Of course, in this day and age, people are always a bit shocked when you take the time to smile at them..have you noticed that? LOL! Sort of sad in a way that we have become such an isolated world. Anyway, my health...I have managed to stay out of the hospital so I am VERY happy! However, the Myastenia gravis is progressing. I hope to be able to start some new medication in mid March that will help with the Myastenia Gravis so please continue to keep me and my husband too in your prayers. Your prayers and letters of support truly keep me going :) As someone told me, just think of it as Jesus squeezing you a bit too tightly right now. If I imagine that, then I feel better because I know that I am save in Christ's arms. Thank you for sharing that with me..and I hope someone else will also get comfort from that image. Until next month...may God grace your lives and comfort you...Gentle hugs, Shelley

February 2001 Let Go and Let God

I was admitted again into the hospital. I was diagnosed with another autoimmune disease called Myastenia Gravis. I was in the hospital for 10 days. Yes, I was scared especially after all of my blood levels dropped to dangerous levels. However, I asked God to help me endure the suffering and I gave it all up to him and as soon as I did that...I felt a lot better. Again, I do not know how people who do not have faith can endure such a test. I am overwhelmed by the love that God shows me every day. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as well as my husband and my friends and family who also are feeling very scared and helpless right now. Ask God to give them strength and courage. Your letters and emails continue to keep me going. I hope that I, in return, have helped each one of you that visits.... :) Until next month...Gentle hugs..